On edge...

Starting to have major panic attacks about this pregnancy. I mean, I'm always on edge, but bordering viability and the third trimester are just sending me over the edge. 

Yes, I'm seeing the doctor more than most people, but that doesn't give me any more guarantees that we will bring a sweet precious baby home with us. 

I look into the eyes of our sweet son Noah day in and day out and think about our sweet Mason who should be with us today. He was supposed to be safe, but seriously... No guarentees. Nothing is promised to us. All I can do is pray and have faith in God's will. Let me tell you... It's so stinking hard.

Anyways, I'm definitely on edge. Say a prayer for me and baby girl (and poor Noah and Jonathan for putting up with me). I could really use some uplift.